Funny - Chat Messages

Nobody like me, so I always have 1 friend

What is the end of everything?....The answer is g. Get it?

Do they have reserved parking for non-handicap people at the Special Olympics?

:) My darling my love, my beautiful wife. Marrying you screwed up my life :S

I sat back looking at the stars and began to think.. where the HECK is my roof?!

One day, we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject

Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife

~*~What happens if you get scared half to death 2 timez?~*~

me done good in english!

Women/Men are proof that women/men can take a joke

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More Funny Chat Messages:

My life is like a porno-movie, without the sex

The height of laziness is a man is shitting on the beach and waiting for the tide

What do an Icebear have after swimming? Snowballs!

I wear the pants in this house. My wife just tells me which pair to wear

I drink to make other people interesting

You cant have everything, Where would u put it?

What is the end of everything?....The answer is g. Get it?

What do they call Bush his zipper? The "U.S. Open

Why do our noses run and our feet smell?

I am on the seafood diet. I see food and I eat it!

One-Liner Top 5:

Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.
Do you wanna see a magic trick? Watch me pull something out of my pants!
Becoming a father is easy enough, but being one can be very rough.
People say I'm condescending. That means I talk down to people.
If winning isn't everything why do they keep score?