Funny - Chat Messages

My door is always open so feel free to leave

Beer: helping ugly people get laid since 1823

Good girls go to school,bad girls go to the mall...So, wanna come shopping with me!?

Yes.. It was I who let the dogs out!

Why do our noses run and our feet smell?

Time flies like the wind; fruit flies like bananas

Do you got with me get lost? I know the way

Flying is simple. You just throw yourself at the ground and miss

The pen is mightier than the sword, and considerably easier to write with

I used to sell furniture for a living. The trouble was, it was my own

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More Funny Chat Messages:

Knowledge Is Knowing That A Tomato Is A Fruit, Wisdom Is Not Putting It In A Fruit Salad.

Do they have reserved parking for non-handicap people at the Special Olympics?

>> I am nobody, no body is perfect, therefore i am perfect! ;)

Now that I have a gun...u may run or hide :P

Why is it that the most unattractive people in this world insist on being nudists?

I wear the pants in this house. My wife just tells me which pair to wear

[2 + 2 = 5] for extremely large values of 2.

ιι λм λ gααиgѕѕ☆αя ∂υυ∂ε вυ ι αιιи’т gσт ησ ρσρριιиg вαηиgεя ƨѕσ . . ωнδ¢н мє ∂υ мє =]

Behind every successful woman, is a man who is surprised

The more I learn, the more I forget. So why would I learn?

One-Liner Top 5:

Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.
Did you hear about the dyslexic Satanist? He sold his soul to Santa.
Apple should make a sarcasm font and call it the iRoll.
Do you wanna see a magic trick? Watch me pull something out of my pants!
People say I'm condescending. That means I talk down to people.