Bad Jokes

This page contains 10 Bad Jokes. The jokes are in order of votes, the best Bad Jokes first.

Hi, need to talk to you asap.
Need your help.
Don't want anyone else to know...I'm at the police station, have been caught drink driving.
Urine sample was positive, I've stolen the sample and tried to run off with it!
...
Now I'm being charged with taking the piss ...

Skinny little white guy goes into an elevator, looks up and sees this HUGE black guy standing next to him.
The big guy sees the little guy staring at him looks down and says: '7 feet tall, 350 pounds, 20 inch private, 3 pound testicles, Turner Brown.'
The little guy faints and falls to the floor.
The big guy kneels down and brings him to, shaking him.
The big guy says: 'What's wrong with you?'
In a weak voice the little guy says, 'What EXACTLY did you say to me?'
The big dude says: 'I saw your curious look and figured I'd just give you the answers to the questions everyone always asks me.....
I'm 7 feet tall, I weigh 350 pounds, I have a 20 inch private, my testicles weigh 3 pounds each, and my name is Turner Brown.'
The small guy says: 'Turner Brown?!...Sweet Jesus, I thought you said, 'Turn around'

What do you call a prostitute with no arms or legs?
Cash and carry!

What do you do if your dishwasher stops working.
Kick her.

What is worse than ten dead people in one trashcan?
One dead person in ten trashcans!

Why did Smokey the Bear never have children?
Because every time his wife got hot, he hit her with a shovel.
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