Celebrity Jokes
This page contains 10 Celebrity Jokes. The jokes are in order of votes, the best Celebrity Jokes first.What does J.Lo and a doorknobs have in common?
Everyone gets a turn.
What do Osama bin Laden and Custer have in common?
They both wondered where all those tomahawks were coming from!
Five presidents are on a plane: George Washington, Abraham Lincoln, John Adams, Thomas Jefferson, and George W.
Bush.
George Washington says, 'I will make someone happy!'
and throws a dollar bill off the plane.
Then Abraham Lincoln says, 'I will make five people happy!'
and throws 5 one dollar bills off the plane.
Then John Adams says, 'I will make 500 people happy!'
and throws 500 one dollar bills off the plane.
Then Thomas Jefferson says, 'I will make the whole world happy!'
and throws George W.
Bush off the plane.
What does GOP stand for?
Grabs Our Pussy
Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.
Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
Donald trump hairline is receding faster than the shoreline on the 18th tee at his golf course in Ireland.
Trump hates illegals, Carson hates Muslims, Fiorina hates women, Huckabee hates gays, and Jeb hates questions about his idiot brother.
Meanwhile, Republican leaders unveiled the new tax plan.
It is over 400 pages long.
And experts are still analyzing it.
Apparently the plan would cut the number of tax brackets for individuals down to three.
It would be 35%, 25%, and 12%.
Which coincidentally also matches the trajectory of Trump's approval ratings.
Weird coincidence.
Five presidents are on a plane: George Washington, Abraham Lincoln, Thomas Jefferson, George W.
Bush, and Bill Clinton.
George Washington says: 'I will make someone happy!'
and throws a dollar bill off the plane.
Then Abraham Lincoln says: 'I will make five people happy!'
and throws 5 one dollar bills off the plane.
Then Thomas Jefferson says: 'I will make 500 people happy!'
and throws 500 one dollar bills off the plane.
Then George W.
Bush says: 'I will make the whole world happy!'
and throws Bill Clinton off the plane!
Bush Fans There's a teacher in a small Texas town.
She asks her class how many of them are Bush fans.
Not really knowing what a Bush fan is, but wanting to be liked by the teacher, all the kids raise their hands except one boy--Johnny.
The teacher asks Johnny why he has decided to be different.
Johnny says, 'I'm not a Bush fan.'
The teacher says, 'Why aren't you a Bush fan?'
Johnny says, 'I'm a John F.
Kerry fan.'
The teacher asks why he's a Kerry fan.
The boy says, 'Well, my mom's a Kerry fan, and my Dad's a Kerry fan, so I'm a Kerry fan!'
The teacher is kind of angry, because this is Texas, so she says, 'What if you're Mom was a moron, and you're dad was an idiot, what would that make you?'
Johnny says, 'That would make me a Bush fan.'
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