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Celebrity Jokes

This page contains 10 Celebrity Jokes. The jokes are in order of votes, the best Celebrity Jokes first.

Did you hear Lorena Bobbit was almost killed in a traffic accident?
Some dick cut her off!

Einstein climbs to the top of Mt.
Sinai to get close enough to talk to God.
Looking up, he asks the Lord... 'God, what does a million years mean to you?'
The Lord replies, 'A minute.'
'Einstein asks, 'And what does a million dollars mean to you?'
The Lord replies, 'A penny.'
Einstein asks, 'Can I have a penny?'
The Lord replies, 'In a minute.'

During late spring one year, Paris Hilton was trying out her new boat.
She was unable to have her boat perform, travel through water, or do any maneuvers whatsoever no matter how hard she tried.
After trying for over three days to make it work properly, she decided to seek help.
She putted the boat over to the local marina in hopes that someone there could identify her problem.
Workers determined that everything from the engine to the out-drive was working perfectly on the topside of the boat.
So, a puzzled marina employee jumped into the water to check underneath the boat for problems.
Because he was laughing so hard, he came up choking on water and gasping for air.
Under the boat, still strapped in place securely, was the trailer.

What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?
'Let me see your birth certificate'.

Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?
Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!

Why don't black cats cross Trump's path?
Because they are afraid of pussy grabbers.

That awkward moment Donald Trump watches Zootopia and realizes its a satire about his presidency.

What do Michael Jackson and a toilet have in commin?
They both say '
asses go here '!!

I am so pissed off!
i have jus bought a computer game, colin mcrae in a helicopter, it keeps crashing.
it cost me �50 its wank.

Poor Monica After a relaxing bath...
Monica Lewinsky was looking at herself, nude in a mirror...
Her frustration over her lack of ability to lose weight, was depressing her...
In an act of desperation, she decided to call on God for help...
'God....
If you take away my love handles, I'll devote my life to you,' she prayed...
And just like that...
her ears fell off.

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