Corny Jokes
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Corny Jokes

This page contains 10 Corny Jokes. The jokes are in order of votes, the best Corny Jokes first.

Once there was a cuban, mexican,nigeran, and a white guy stuck in a boat in the middle of the ocean.
the cuban guy pulls out a cigar takes one puff and throws it into the ocean the white guy astioned asked him why did u throw that into the ocean thats a huge thing in the usa the cuban guy jus said we have to many of them.
then the nigeran guy took out so vodica took one sip and threw it in the ocean again the white guy asked why did u throw it into the ocean he just said we jus have to much of it.
so then the white guy thought about what they had too much of and then he threw the mexican into the ocean

Heres this lady who has been married for a lot of years and her husband just died.
She feeling lonely she puts an ad in the paper say that she is looking for man who wont abuse her, run away from her, but most importantly can give her excellent pleasure.
So one day this man comes along with no arms or legs and rings the door bell.
She answers the door and says im your man.
She looks at him and but you have no arms.
he says exactly i cant abuse you.
so she says but u also have no legs.
he says exactly i cant run away from you.
than she says but i need a man that can give me pleasure.
and he say how do u think i rung the door bell

True or False
1. A menstrual cycle has three wheels.
True or False
2. Asphalt describes rectal problems.
True or False
3.
Spread Eagle is an extinct bird.
True or False
4.
Vagina is a medical term used to describe a Heart Attack.
True or False
5.
The clitoris is a type of flower.
True or False
6.
A G-string is part of a fiddle.
True or False
7.
Semen is a term for sailors.
True or False
8.
Anus is a Latin term for yearly.
True or False
9.
Testicles are found on an Octopus.
True or False
10.
A pubic hair is a wild rabbit.
True or False
11.
KOTEX is a radio station in Cincinnati.
True or False
12.
Masturbate is used to catch large fish.
True or False
13.
Coitus is a musical instrument.
True or False
14.
Fetus is a character on Gunsmoke.
True or False
15.
An umbilical cord is part of a parachute.
True or False
16.
A condom is a large apartment complex.
True or False
17.
An orgasm is a person who accompanies a church choir.
True or False
18.
A diaphragm is a drawing in geometry.
True or False
19.
A dildo is a variety of sweet pickle.
True or False
20.
An erection is when Japanese people vote.
True or False
21.
A lesbian is a person from the Middle East.
True or False
22.
Sodomy is a special land of fast growing grass.
True or False
23.
Pornography is the business of making records.
True or False
24.
Genitals are people of non-Jewish origin.
True or False
25.
Douche is the French word for 'twelve.'
True or False

The following quotes were allegedly taken from actual performance evaluations:
1 Since my last report, he has reached rock bottom and has started to dig.
2 His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of morbid curiosity.
3 I would not allow this associate to breed.
4 Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap.
5 When she opens her mouth, it seems that this is only to change whichever foot was previously in there.
6 He would be out of his depth in a puddle.
7 This young lady has delusions of adequacy.
8 She sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.
9 This associate should go far - and the sooner he starts the better.
10 This associate is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.

A girl was throwing stones at a cow.
Her father came & scolded her for throwing the stones at the cow & then told to her that cows are like mothers to them & should be respected.
Next day guests come to their to their house & asked for her father.
She said 'Father is pressing breast of mother'.

English: This is your Captain speaking, we have leveled off and are cruising at flight level three five zero, feel free to move about the cabin, also the First Officer has turned off the no smoking sign, the flight attendants will be serving cocktails and refreshments momentarily, so just sit back and enjoy the rest of the flight, we'll be arriving at our destination in 20 minutes, and I expect no delays.
Enjoy the rest of your flight.
Ebonics: Ebonia Airlines Dis be yo' main man, we be chillin at tray-five -o, if you be flexin get up off yo ass and shake that thang, my homey be killin the man's opression if you wanna smoke chronic, just hang loose blood, them bitches be cruizin on up with some forty-ounce 8-ball, so stop trippin and sit your ass back down, we be in the hood in no time afterall, i be bumpin switches all da' way.
Peace out!

A little boy came down to breakfast.
Since he lived on a farm, his mother asked if he had done his chores.
'Not yet,' said the little boy.
His mother tells him he can't have any breakfast until he does his chores.
Well, he's a little pissed, so he goes to feed the chickens, and he kicks a chicken.
He goes to feed the cows, and he kicks a cow.
He goes to feed the pigs, and he kicks a pig.
He goes back in for breakfast and his mother gives him a bowl of dry cereal.
'How come I don't get any eggs and bacon?
Why don't I have any milk in my cereal?'
he asks.
'Well,'
his mother says, 'I saw you kick a chicken, so you don't get any eggs.
I saw you kick the pig, so you don't get any bacon, either.
I also saw you kick the cow, so you aren't getting any milk this morning.'
Just about then, his father comes down for breakfast, and he kicks the cat as he's walking into the kitchen.
The little boy looks up at his mother with a smile, and says, 'Are you going to tell him, or should I?'

A man walks into a library and asks for a book on suicide.
The librarian said, 'No sorry, because you won't bring it back'

A Mexican, Italian, and an american were going down the road in a truck and the Italian starts to throw spaghetti out the window and the Mexican asks 'why are you throwing spaghetti out the window?'
The Italian says 'Well where I come from we got a lot of it.'
So the Mexican starts throwing tacos out the window and the American asks 'why are you throwing tacos out the window?'
The Mexican says 'Well where I came from we got a lot of it.'
So the American throws the Mexican out the window and the Italian asks 'why are you did you throw the Mexican out the window?'
The American says 'Well where i come from we got a lot of them.'

Here was a english man a scotish man and a irsh man.
the english man said he had a son born on saint georges day so the english man called his son george.
the scottish man said he had a son and his birthday was on saint andrews day so the scottish man called his son andrew.
the irsh man said he had a son and his sons birthday was on pancakeday so he called his son pancake.




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