Why is there a flap on the back of the Navy uniform?
For the Marine to hold on to!
Have you ever seen a jackass wrapped in plastic?
Show me your license!
What do you call a one-legged lady?
Eileen!
How do you embarrass an archaeologist?
Give him a used tampon and ask him what period it came from!
What do you call a masturbating cow?
Beef Stroke-n-off
What do you get when the Pillsbury Doughboy bends over?
Dough Nuts!
How do you know if a Frenchman has been in your backyard?
Your garbage can is empty and your dog is pregnant!
What do you call a nun who just passed her bar exam?
A sister-in-law!
Did you hear about the shoe factory that burnt down?
Two hundred soles were lost!
Why was the suicide bomber disappointed when he met his 72 virgins?
He blew off his penis!