Lawyers Jokes
This page contains 10 Lawyers Jokes. The jokes are in order of votes, the best Lawyers Jokes first.Lawyers give irrelevant information Two women are on a transcontinental balloon voyage.
Their craft is engulfed in fog, their compass gone awry.
Afraid of landing in the ocean, they drift for days.
Suddenly, the clouds part to show a sunlit meadow below.
As they descend, they see a man walking his dog.
One of the flyers yells to the figure far below, 'Where are we?'
The man yells back, 'About a half mile from town.'
Once again, the balloonists are engulfed in the mist.
One flyer says to the other, 'He must have been a lawyer.'
The other says, 'A lawyer!
How do you know that?'
The first says, 'That?s easy.
The information he gave us was accurate, concise, and entirely irrelevant.'
Two lawyers met at a cocktail party late one night.
'How?s business?' asked the first.
'Rotten,'
replied the other.
'Yesterday, I chased an ambulance for twenty miles.
When I finally caught up to it, there were already two other lawyer hanging on to the bumper.'
What happens when a lawyer takes Viagra?
They grow taller!
How do you stop a lawyer from drowning?
Shoot him before he hits the water!
How many lawyers does it take to screw a light bulb?
One but it has to have a good case!
Definition of a Lawyer: A person who puts two men into a fight and runs off with their clothes.
How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Four, one to climb the ladder, one to hold the ladder, one to shake the ladder and one to sue the ladder company!
Two lawyers were out hunting when they came upon a couple of tracks.
After close examination, the first lawyer declared them to be deer tracks.
The second lawyer disagreed, insisting they must be elk tracks.
They were still arguing when the train hit them.
A junior partner in a law firm was sent to a far away country to represent a long-term client accused of robbery.
After days of trial, the case was won, the client acquitted and released.
Excited about his success, the attorney e-mailed the firm: Justice prevailed.?
The senior partner replied in haste, Appeal immediately?
How do you get a lawyer down from a tree?
Cut the rope!
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 (10) 11 12
Categories:
Animal Bad Bar Dumb Blonde Celebrity Cheesy Chicken Christmas Chuck Norris Clean Computer Corny Dad Dark Humor Doctor Dirty Donald Trump Easter Fat For Kids Funny Riddles Funny Quotes Little Johnny Gay Gender Good Halloween Knock Knock Lawyer Lightbulb Jokes Military Old People One Liner Jokes Ponderisms Puns Redneck Relationship Religious School Short Jokes Silly Skeleton Valentines Day Yo Mama
Funny jokes
- Did You Hear About The Guy Who Died Of A
- If You Eat Too Much Curry, You Get Into A
- I Was At An ATM And This Old Lady Asked
- Two elderly ladies are sitting on the front porch doing nothing
- We All Have One Ginger Friend That Claims To Be
- What Do You Call A Nun In A Wheelchair? Virgin
- What Happened To The Egg When He Was Tickled Too
- I Am Now On Three Dating Sites Because You Can
- Retirement Is The Time In Your Life When Time Is
- Only An Ass Can Be Divided In Half