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Lawyers Jokes

This page contains 10 Lawyers Jokes. The jokes are in order of votes, the best Lawyers Jokes first.

Thank You!

How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?
Cut the rope!

Four surgeons were sitting around discussing who �they like to operate on.
The first surgeon said, 'I like operating on librarians.�When you open them up everything is in alphabetical order'.
The second surgeon said, 'I like operating �on accountants.�When you open them up everything is in numerical order'.
The third surgeon said, 'I like operating on �electricians.�When you open them up everything is color coded.
The fourth surgeon said, 'I like operating �on lawyers'.
The other three surgeons looked at each other in �disbelief. One of them asked why.
The fourth surgeon replied, 'Because they �are heartless, gutless, spineless, and their ass and head are interchangeable'.

What do you call Satan and a lawyer?
Twins!

How many lawyers does it take to plaster a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them!

A good lawyer knows the law.
A great lawyer knows the judge!

What do a lawyer and a sperm have in common?
Both have about a one in 3 million chance of becoming a human being!

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