You might be a redneck if you give Santa three pickled eggs and a cold one instead of cookies and milk.
You might be a redneck If you believe Books are bad luck!
If you open the door to the pickup And soda cans fall out You might be a redneck!
You might be a redneck, if you think 'wind sprints', means running from a fart!
You might be a redneck, if you have to go outside, to get something from your fridge!
What do you get when you have 32 rednecks in a room?
A full set of teeth.
You might be a redneck if your stove is on the porch and your lawn chairs are in the kitchen!
What do Rednecks call four empty Cool Whip containers on a table?
Salad bowls!
You might be a redneck if you spit chewing tobacco in the plants!
You might be a redneck if you wonder how service stations keep their bathrooms so clean!