The other day, i was invited to a "boys night out"
Before i left, my wife asked what time i would be in, so i said before midnight.
Anyway, at the party, the beer went down far too easily.
I looked at my watch and discovered it was nearing 3am.
Anway, the next thing i knew i was staggering home.
As i got in, the cuckoo clock cuckooed 3 times.
I knew that the noise would wake up my wife, so i cuckooed 9 more times.
Impressed with my quick thinking, i found my up the stairs and flopped into bed.
The next morning my wife asked me what time i got in.
I told her 12am.
She didnt look bothered.
Then she said, "we need a new a new cuckoo clock."
When i asked her why, she said, "last night it cuckooed 3 times, paused, cuckooed 4 times more, cleared its throat, cuckooed twice more, giggled, cuckooed 3 more times, then tripped over the cat and farted!"