Valentines Day is here again, and with it the perfect opportunity for marketing departments the world over to romance investors and donors with Valentine-themed promotions! Here are some that didnít quite make it off the drawing board: * Nevada State Tourism Board "Nothing Says I LOVE YOU Like Legalized Prostitution and Gambling" T-shirts, baseball caps, and coffee mugs. * Ku Klux Klan valentineís day heart burning, co-sponsored by Alka Seltzer Vatican Public Relations Office * "Naughty Altar Boy" limited edition ceramic figurine American Heart Association * Chocolate heart with marshallow-filled arteries. Simultaneously a touching token of love and a serious warning to an overweight sweetheart. Daughters of the American Revolution * Illustrated Kama Sutra featuring George and Martha Washington. Comes with authentic period wooden dental dam. PETA * Spray Paint a Red Heart on Joan Riversí Coat Competition National Society of Organ Donors * "My Heart Belongs to You (As Soon As Iím Brain Dead)" cards. Department of Homeland Security * Moving the Valentineís Day National Warning System Code Red for a "High Risk of Loviní".
Break up valentines! Roses are red Violets are blue I have AIDS And now so do you!