Funny Texts | 10 Sms Messages

I am a killer, I kill people for money.....But because you are my friend, I'll kill you for nothing!
Time, is Gods way of making sure everything doesn't happen at the same time.
A chicken sandwitch walked into the bar, ordered some food and beer. The bartender says: "Sorry, we don't serve food here".
Viagra now available in eye drops, you don't get an erection but you look hard!
How many letters are in the Alphabet? Nineteen. Because ET went Home on a UFO and the FBI went after him!
The one who asks is a fool for 5 minutes, the one who does not ask, remains a fool for ever
Did I not see you yesterday at the mall, with a grey jacket? No? O, than it was a rubbish bag after all!
Nostalgia is not what it used to be.
I'm so sorry for not telling you this before. You ought to know how smart, cute, witty, sweet, charming, alluring and wonderful you are!... I didn't know I've influenced you that much!
Ah-- I forgot your name. Can I call you mine? And, in case you forget my name too, call me yours!
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More Sms Messages:


If I were to make a dictionary: CUTE=you; SWEET=you; THOUGHTFUL=you; GOOD LOOKING=you; GORGEOUS=you; LIAR=me!

Roses are red violets are blue i need to kill you

I love working. I can look at it for hours.

LovE is Not HoW LonG U've BeeN 2gEthEr; nOt HoW MucH U've GIvEn oR RecEivE; Not hOw MaNy TimEs U've HeLpEd EaCh OthEr --- Its HoW U VALUE EaCh OtHEr...

What happens when a man is in the water up till his navel ? ...... That is beyond his comprehension.

I want u 2 know that our friendship means a lot 2 me. U cry, I cry. U laugh.. I laugh. U jump out of d window.. I look down n then.. I laugh again.. hahaha

No one is too young for love, because love doesn't come from your mind, which knows your age, but from your heart, which knows no age.

Why does an answering machine never gives an answer when I ask something ?

Do you think I can live for another forty years? ... Do you drink? ... No! ... Do you smoke? ... No! ... Do you visit the whores? ... No! ....... Why do you want to live another forty years?

It is white and it stands in the corner? ....... A punished fridge