Funny Texts | 10 Sms Messages

Hello I am a virus and I am entering your brain right now... Sorry I am leaving now, I can't find a brain


As much use as a trap door on a lifeboat


As long as they pretend to pay me, I pretend I am working.


What happens when you got scared twice half-dead ?


There are a lot of birds wispering only about you, you should once listen to them, then you would know how much I love you.


What kind of children do you get using a yellow condom ? ................... NONE ! you stupid !


Do not disturb, I am enough disturbed as it is..


20% of the population is now drinking coffee, 60% is having sex, 19% is watching television and one yokel is now holding his mobile in his hand


Wht do U cll a vicar on a mo2r bike? Rev.


When a man talks dirty 2 a women, its sexual harassment when a women talks dirty 2 a man, its 3.95 per minute!


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More Sms Messages:


I only drink to make my wife look prettier


She's been up and down more times than a whore's drawers


wat does it profit a guy if he gains the whole girls and suffer for the lost of his most lovely girl. I love u


Knock! Knock! Who's there? Fanny. Fanny who? Fanny the way you keep saying 'Who's there? Every time I knock.


MuM: Have you brought the matches home? Son: Yes! Mum: Are they working??? Son: Yes! I have try up all the fire macthes... It's working.


SMAK ... A mobile kiss... Keep your mobile close to your ear!


Roses of red grow in my heart and they will never wither... 'Cause they bloom every time I see your smile, hear your voice or just think of you!


Be yourself, there are enough other people.


How can u tell the rain not 2 fall when clouds exist? How can u tell the leaves not 2 fall when wind exist? How can u tell me not to fall in friendship when u exist.


I tried calling you to see how you were doing, a friend of mine called you and said you almost fell of the horse yesterday, but so happen a Walmart worker unplugged it just in time





One-Liner Top 5:

Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.
I feel like I would enjoy getting out of bed more if I had to do it only three times a week. This every-day thing is overkill.
Can I have your picture so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?
Love is like a machine... sometimes you need a good screw to fix it.
The more people I meet, the more I like my dog.