Funny Texts | 10 Sms Messages

Sometimes I wake up grumpy. Other times I let her sleep.

While walking down the street, I heard an old man say "I've been in love with the same woman for almost 50 years now." I was touched until I heard him say "I wish she knew."

No guts, no glory, no brain, same story

Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"

Wherever you go, whatever you do, may god's angels watch over you.

How come night falls but day breaks?

If you are alone, I'll be your shadow. If you want to cry, I'll be your shoulder. If you want a hug, I'll be your pillow. If you need to be happy, I'll be your smile. If you need money, wait for your salary.

Crime doesn't pay...Does that mean my job is a crime?

(_!_)An arse (__!__)Fat arse (!)Tight arse (_?_)Dumb arse (_*_)Sore arse (_zzz_)Tired arse (_E=mc2_)Smart arse (_x_)Kiss my arse!!

I want to suck you... lick you... wanna move my tongue all over you...wanna feel you in my mouth...yep, tat's how u...eat an ice cream!

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More Sms Messages:


Wat u see as truth wat u see as lies remember that true friendship never dies although we may change & drift apart, ill always value u deep within my heart!


Boys shoulld tell tha trouserz its rude to point. LOL


Who's there? Atch. Atch who? Bless you.


// Baybee You Are A Star You Are Special You Mean Alot Maybe Thats Why *I* Am Taking The Time To Tell You How Much Yuu Mean To Me '0x Love You Lots ... Without YOu My Life Wuld Bee... //InComplete //Baybee x


3 words made my heart beat faster, 3 words made my legs shake 3 words made my head spin, 3 words: I love you!


He said: ?I thank you for the wonderful talk." ... I had only been listening. When your youngest child needs sex education, you have badly informed your elder children on the subject.


I applied for a job at a mental hospital, they said I needed atleast 24 hrs. with a retard.... Wanna hang out 2morrow... I got candy...


I remind u that the most powerful force in the universe is sms gossip.


Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"






One-Liner Top 5:

Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.
Do you wanna see a magic trick? Watch me pull something out of my pants!
People say I'm condescending. That means I talk down to people.
If winning isn't everything why do they keep score?
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day.