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Sms Messages

Reporter: How does it feel to become a millionaire?
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Opticians bend the rims/frames of your glasses for they are too polite to say that your ears are in the wrong place.
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Did I not see you yesterday at the mall, with a grey jacket? No? O, than it was a rubbish bag after all!.
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The greatest good you can do for another is not just to share your riches but to reveal to him his own.
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It only takes a minute to get a crush on someone an hour to like someone a day to love someone but it takes a lifetime to forget someone
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Insanity is my only means of relaxation
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The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past, you can't get on well in life until you let go of past failures and heartaches.
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When swimming is good for the development of our arms and legs, why do fish not have arms and legs ?
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I love two things, a rose and you. A rose for a short while, but you the rest of my life
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There was this Eskimo chick who spent the night with her boyfriend. Next morning she found out she was 6 months pregnant.
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More Sms Messages:


Guy asks his waiter how they prepare their chicken. The waiter replies 'nothing special - we just flat out tell 'em they're gonna die'.

Y R dumb blonde jokes all 1-liners? So men cn underst& Tm.

What do you say to a woman with 2 black eyes? You don't, you've told her twice already!

stop it. oh u re still doing it. stop it right now. why re u fucking ur phone with ur thumb?

Whiter than a pair of Snow White's knickers

20% of the population is now drinking coffee, 60% is having sex, 19% is watching television and one yokel is now holding his mobile in his hand

a man got on to the bus, and saw a really hot nun. he went up to her and talked to her. he wantd to have sex with her. nun said no. so the bus driver asked him , o u like the nun. he replied yes. bus driver says she goes to the grave every saturday at 9pm, pretend ur god. so he goes to the graveyard and finds the nun there. he asks to have sex and the replie is yes. after hours of sex the man says haha im not god. then the nun takes of her clothes and says hahaha im the bus driver.

As much use as a one legged man at an arse kicking competition

How do you keep a blonde busy all day? Put her in a round room and tell her to sit in the corner

Friendly words do not have to be long, the echo never dies.