Funny Texts | 10 Funny Insults

Yo mama so old I told her to act her own age, and she died.

Yo mama so greasy she used bacon as a band-aid!

"Do you still love nature, despite what it did to you?" - Anon

Yo mama so flat she's jealous of the wall!

"Most of the time he sounds like he has a mouth full of toilet paper." - Rex Reed talking about Marlon Brando

I used to think that you were a big pain in the neck. Now I have a much lower opinion of you.

What happened? Did you get dressed in the dark?

yo mama so ugly that when she entered a beauty contest but it was actually an ugly contest the worker there said no proffesionals allowed.

game hopper beautiful

We know that you would go to the end of the world for us. But would you stay there?

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More Funny Insults:


We hear you are a lady killer. They take one look at you and die of fright!!


Before you came along we were hungry. Now we are fed up.


Yo mama so ugly they push her face into dough to make gorilla cookies.


Yo mama so fat the only pictures you have of her are satellite pictures


Yo mama so fat she sat on the beach and Greenpeace threw her in!


"Is he just doing a bad Elvis pout, or was he born that way?" - Freddie Mercury on Billy Idol


Keep talking. I always yawn when I'm interested.


your momma so ugly she need plastic surgery to walk in wal-mart


We can always tell when you are lying. Your lips move.


yo mammas so old she sat behind jesus in school.





One-Liner Top 5:

Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.
Did you hear about the dyslexic Satanist? He sold his soul to Santa.
Try an internship! Internships give you all the experience of a summer job without the hassle of a paycheck.
Apple should make a sarcasm font and call it the iRoll.
Hey baby, wanna violate the Pauli Exclusion Principle with me?