Funny Texts | 10 Funny Insults

It's hard to get the big picture when you have such a small screen.

If sex were fast food, you'd have an arch over your head.

You add to, not diminish, pain!

Sit down and give your mind a rest.

If you were orphaned when you were a child, I feel sorry for you, but not for your parents.

Yo mama so fat she broke her leg, and gravy poured out!

You're the best at all you do -- and all you do is make people hate you.

Your momma is so fat that when see turns around see finds another pound

A sharp tongue is no indication of a keen mind.

She had a mouth dirtier than a wicker toilet seat.

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More Funny Insults:


Now she's at rest and so am I"- John Dryden on his wife


your about as gay as two guys playing tummy sticks in a field of flowers with white frosting around their lips


We heard that when you ran away from home your folks sent you a note saying, "Do not come home and all will be forgiven."


your mother is old her breast milk is powdered


Just cuz ur mommas a bitch doesn't mean dat i have 2 b one 2


"She not only kept her lovely figure, she's added so much to it." - Bob Fosse


He's so dense that light bends around him.


You never strike out blindly; you fail in the light.


If we were to kill everybody who hates you, it wouldn't be murder; it would be genocide!


What he lacks in intelligence, he more than makes up for in stupidity.





One-Liner Top 5:

Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.
I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom until they are flashing behind you.
Apple should make a sarcasm font and call it the iRoll.
Do you wanna see a magic trick? Watch me pull something out of my pants!
People say I'm condescending. That means I talk down to people.