Funny Insults * 10 Funny Insults

When you get run over by a car it shouldn't be listed under accidents.

He named the street he owned after his wife. What a grand statement of his love for her; for she was cold, hard, cracked, and only gets plowed around the holidays.

"Here lies my wife: here let her lie !

Yo mama so stupid she told everyone that she was "illegitiment" because she couldn't read

How many years did it take you to learn how to breathe?

"The stupid person's idea of a clever person." - Elizabeth Bowen talking about Aldous Huxley

Pardon me, but you've obviously mistaken me for someone who gives a damn.

Yo mama so stupid she stole free bread.

I hear the only place you're ever invited is outside.

I can't seem to remember you name, and please don't help me!

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More Funny Insults:


Ignorance can be cured. Stupid is forever.


I reprimanded my brother for mimicking you. I told him not to act like a fool.


"My wife asked what it would take to make her look good I said "About a mile" "- Anon


They say opposites attract. I hope you meet someone who is good-looking, intelligent, and cultured.


I hear you are being accepted into an exclusive club because they need someone to snub.


You are so fat that I hear you were arrested three times for jaywalking when all the time you were just standing on the corner waiting for the light to change.


Yo mama so fat that she would have been in E.T., but when she rode the bike across the moon, she caused an eclipse.


I know you are nobody's fool, but maybe someone will adopt you.


Yo mama so fat she rolled over 4 quarters and it made a dollar!


You are so boring that you can't even entertain a doubt.



One-Liner Top 5:

The good Lord didn't create anything without a purpose, but mosquitoes come close.

The value of money in a relationship: the 10 bucks that the wife and the tax inspection don't know about are worth more than the 100 that both know about.

Children in the dark make accidents, but accidents in the dark make children.

What do you call Santa's helpers? Subordinate Clauses.

Lite: the new way to spell "Light," now with 20% fewer letters!




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