Funny Texts | 10 Funny Insults

Your dog is so stupid, he chases parked cars.

Yo mama so ugly she gets 364 extra days to dress up for Halloween!

Is your name Dan Druff? You get into people's hair.

Yo mama so stupid she hears it's chilly outside so she gets a bowl

You should have been born in the Dark Ages; you look terrible in the light.

Yo mama so nasty she made speed stick slow down.

Yo mama so nasty that pours salt water down her pants to keep her crabs fresh.

So ugly, robbers give him their masks to wear.

I'm going to memorize your name and throw my head away.

Hey! I know what sign you were born under! RED LIGHT DISTRICT!

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More Funny Insults:


So, a thought crossed your mind? Must have been a long and lonely journey.


I certainly hope you are sterile.


Do you want me to accept you as you are, or do you want me to like you?


yo mama so fat she has her own zip code


I'd hate to see you go, but I'd love to watch you leave!


She had a mouth dirtier than a wicker toilet seat.


Someone said that you are not fit to sleep with pigs. I stuck up for the pigs.


Heard your family went to a restaurant where they serve crabs just so they could bring you along.


Yo mama teeth are so yellow she spits butter!


You're so old you drove a chariot to school.





One-Liner Top 5:

Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.
Did you hear about the dyslexic Satanist? He sold his soul to Santa.
Apple should make a sarcasm font and call it the iRoll.
Do you wanna see a magic trick? Watch me pull something out of my pants!
People say I'm condescending. That means I talk down to people.