Funny Texts | 10 Funny Insults

Man alive! But I wish you weren't.

If you were a body of water, you'd be a kiddie pool.

Hello -- tall, dark and obnoxious!

Are you always so stupid or is today a special occasion?

He is so old that his blood type was discontinued. ~ Bill Dana ~

You've never been outspoken; no one has ever been able to.

Yo mama so fat she wakes up in sections!

Yo mama so ugly her mom had to tie a steak around her neck to get the dogs to play with her.

I believe in respect for the dead; in fact, I could only respect you if you WERE dead.

Take a vacation; go to Club Dead.

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More Funny Insults:


Make somebody happy. Mind your own business.


Why don't you go to the library and brush up on your ignorance?


Yo mama so ugly they shot gorilas in the mist in her shower


Yo mama so poor when she goes to KFC, she has to lick other people's fingers!


Yo momma's so fat at a restaurant when they give her the menu she replies " yes Please"


You're a habit I'd like to kick; with both feet!!


Yo Mommas glasses so thick she can see in the futer -Sammy


"To live in Australia permanently is rather like going to a party and dancing all night with your mother"- Barry Humphries


Yo mama so ugly if ugly were bricks she'd have her own projects!


yomamasostupid





One-Liner Top 5:

Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.
Can I have your picture so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?
No, those pants don't make you look fatter. I mean, how could they?
Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is.
Lite: the new way to spell "Light," now with 20% fewer letters!