Funny Texts | 10 Funny Insults

Yo mama so old she has a picture of Moses in her yearbook.

Yo mama so ugly they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints.

Yo mama so short you can see her feet on her drivers lisence!

"See, that's what's meant by dark and handsome. When it's dark, he's handsome."- Anon

He is so short, when it rains he is always the last one to know.

"He was happily married - but his wife wasn't." - Victor Borge talking about Mozart

He'd steal the straw from his mother's kennel.

Brains aren't everything. In fact, in your case they're nothing!

Yo mama so fat when she has wants someone to shake her hand, she has to give directions!

Yo mama so fat when she goes to an amusement park, people try to ride HER!

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More Funny Insults:


Man alive! But I wish you weren't.


Go ahead, tell them everything you know. It'll only take 10 seconds.


You were the answer to a prayer. Your parents prayed that the world would be made to suffer and here you came along.


Yo momma's so ugly they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower


You're so ugly, when you walk into taco bell, EVERYONE runs for the border!


"My wife asked what it would take to make her look good I said "About a mile" "- Anon


Yo mama so fat that her senior pictures had to be arial views!


His brain waves fall a little short of the beach.


I hear you are an officer. Your rank is -- just plain rank!


You are the answer to my prayer!! I prayed to find out if things could get worse!!





One-Liner Top 5:

Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.
I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom until they are flashing behind you.
Apple should make a sarcasm font and call it the iRoll.
Do you wanna see a magic trick? Watch me pull something out of my pants!
People say I'm condescending. That means I talk down to people.