Funny Texts | 10 Funny Insults

You've never been outspoken; no one has ever been able to.

Fat? You're not fat, you're just ... fat.

I reprimanded my son for mimicking you. I told him not to act like a fool.

They say truth is stranger than fiction. Look, your mother gave birth to you.

Yo mama so fat she uses a mattress for a tampon.

Yo mama so dark that she can leave fingerprints on charcoal.

with a face like yours i would rather be blind

Yo mama's so stupid she thought turkeys could fly.

You could throw her in the river and skim ugly for two days.

Yo mama so bald that she took a shower and got brain-washed.

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More Funny Insults:


You started at the bottom -- and it's been downhill ever since.


I understand you, but thousands wouldn't!


"Martin's acting is so inept that even his impersonation of a lush seems unconvincing." - Harry Medved on Dean Martin


For two cents, I`d give you a piece of my mind -- and all of yours.


Yo mamma so fat that when she went to Narnia all the snow disappeared


Yo momma's so ugly instead of putting the bungee cord around her ankle, they put it around her neck


Yo mama so bald even a wig wouldn't help!


Look, don't go to a mind reader; go to a palmist; I know you've got a palm.


Yo momma's so stupid she got fired from the M&M factory for throwing away all the W's.


Is Your Mouth Getting To Big For Your Muzzle?!!





One-Liner Top 5:

Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.
Did you hear about the dyslexic Satanist? He sold his soul to Santa.
Try an internship! Internships give you all the experience of a summer job without the hassle of a paycheck.
Apple should make a sarcasm font and call it the iRoll.
Hey baby, wanna violate the Pauli Exclusion Principle with me?