Funny Texts | 10 Funny Insults

You say that you are always bright and early. Well, OK!! We know you are early.

Hey, act your age -- senile!

His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of morbid curiosity.

Yo mama hair so short when she braided it they looked like stiches.

"When they asked Jack Benny to do something for the Actor's Orphanage - he shot both his parents and moved in." - Bob Hope talking about Jack Benny

I hope you never get a tetanus shot; maybe you'll windup with lockjaw.

Don't you need a license to be that ugly?

"He's a male chauvinistic piglet." - Betty Friedan talking about Groucho Marx

Someone took a photo of you once, but it didn't turn out. You could be seen too clearly.

Yo mama so fat when she steps on a scale, it read "one at a time, please"

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More Funny Insults:


the best part of you ran down your mother's leg.


The inbreeding is certainly obvious in your family.


If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean.


"She has discovered the secret of perpetual middle age."- Oscar Levant talking about Zsa Zsa Gabor


Yo mama head so big she has to step into her shirts.


Yo mama so fat I had to take a train and two buses just to get on the her good side!


Your dog is so stupid, he chases parked cars.


Yo mama so fat she sat on the beach and Greenpeace threw her in!


I hear you are being accepted into an exclusive club cause they need someone to snub.


Yo momma's so stupid she ordered a cheese burger from McDonald's and said "Hold the cheese."





One-Liner Top 5:

Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.
Can I have your picture so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?
No, those pants don't make you look fatter. I mean, how could they?
Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is.
Lite: the new way to spell "Light," now with 20% fewer letters!