Funny Texts | 10 Funny Insults

He can think without moving his lips!
"The enviably attractive nephew who sings an Irish ballad for the company and then winsomely disappears before the table clearing and dishwashing begin." - Lyndon B. Johnson on JFK
You liked your first chin so much, you added two more.
Yo mama so fat she has to buy two airline tickets.
Yo mama so nasty she has to creep up on bathwater.
You are so stupid you got hit by a parked car
Careful now, don't let your brains go to your head!
If your brain was chocolate it wouldn't fill an M&M.
Yo mama so ugly she tried to take a bath the water jumped out!
When you pass away and people ask me what the cause of your death was, I'll say your stupidity.
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More Funny Insults:


If I said anything to you that I should be sorry for, I'm glad.

"Who picks your clothes - Stevie Wonder?" - Don Rickles

Yo mama house so dirty she has to wipe her feet before she goes outside.

"Can't act. Slightly bald. Can dance a little." - Anonymous screen test about Fred Astaire

Don't you need a license to be that ugly?

You're so old you drove a chariot to school.

You used to be arrogant and obnoxious. Now you are just the opposite. You are obnoxious and arrogant.

If you don't like my opinion of you - improve yourself!

I hear you were born on a farm. Any more in the litter?

I don't hold your behavior against you because I realize it was caused by childhood trauma; your parents spanked you when you fell on your head and broke the cement.