Funny Insults * 10 Funny Insults

"Her voice sounded like an eagle being goosed." - Ralph Novak on Yoko Ono

Slit your wrists - it will lower your blood pressure.

When people cut their fingers you cry over it just so that you can get salt in the wound.

When you talk, other people get hoarse just listening.

I worship the ground that awaits you

You have a lot of well-wishers. They would all like to throw you down one.

Your mouth is getting too big for your muzzle.

Do you want do die stupid?

People clap when they see you - their hands over their eyes or ears.

Yo mama so fat she looks like she's smuggling a Volkswagon!

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More Funny Insults:


People say that you are outspoken but not by anyone that I know of.


You say that you are always bright and early. Well, OK!! We know you are early.


"He emits an air of overwhelming vanity combined with some unspecific nastiness, like a black widow spider in heat. But nobody seems to notice. He could be reciting 'Fox's Book of Martyrs' in Finnish and these people would be rolling out of their seats." - Roger Gellert on John Cleese


Yo mama so fat, slap her legs and you can ride the waves.


He comes from a long line of real estate people -- they're a vacant lot.


Yo momma's so stupid she got hit by a parked car.


Yo mama so fat when she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo.


You are pretty as a picture and we'd love to hang you.


what makes ugly babys? ask your mom!-brent


You're so fat you saw 90210 on a scale.



One-Liner Top 5:

The good Lord didn't create anything without a purpose, but mosquitoes come close.

The value of money in a relationship: the 10 bucks that the wife and the tax inspection don't know about are worth more than the 100 that both know about.

Children in the dark make accidents, but accidents in the dark make children.

Lite: the new way to spell "Light," now with 20% fewer letters!

What do you call Santa's helpers? Subordinate Clauses.




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