Funny Insults * 10 Funny Insults

Learn from your parents' mistakes - use birth control!

We heard that when you ran away from home your folks sent you a note saying, "Do not come home and all will be forgiven."

"I don't want you to turn the other cheek - it's just as ugly."- Anon

You're so ugly your husband goes everywhere alone.

"She loves 'NATURE' - In spite of what it did to her."- Anon

I hear you are a real humanitarian. You have kept three or four detectives working regularly.

I wish you were all here. I don't like to think there is more!

His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of morbid curiosity.

We can always tell when you are lying. Your lips move.

You're acquitting yourself in such a way that no jury ever would.

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More Funny Insults:


Is your name Maple Syrup? It should be, you sap.


In the dictionary under the word, "stupid," it says, "see him."


Yo mama so fat the only pictures you have of her are satellite pictures


you moma is so fat when she ate a computer she was worldwide


Yo mama twice the man you are.


Yo mama so dark that she can leave fingerprints on charcoal.


Yo mama feet are so big her shoes have to have license plates!


Yo momma's so stupid she asked you what the number for 911 was.


Yo mama so stupid she sits on the TV, and watches the couch!


Yo momma's so stupid she got hit by a parked car.



One-Liner Top 5:

The good Lord didn't create anything without a purpose, but mosquitoes come close.

The value of money in a relationship: the 10 bucks that the wife and the tax inspection don't know about are worth more than the 100 that both know about.

Children in the dark make accidents, but accidents in the dark make children.

Lite: the new way to spell "Light," now with 20% fewer letters!

What do you call Santa's helpers? Subordinate Clauses.




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