Funny Texts | 10 Funny Insults

You're so low you could milk a pregnant snake!


The next time you shave, could you stand a little closer to the razor?


I hear you pick your friends -- to pieces!!


You are as strong as an ox and almost as intelligent.


"He doesn't know the meaning of the word "fear" - but then again he doesn't know the meaning of most words"- Anon.


"A triumph of the embalmers art"- Gore Vidal on Ronald Reagan


Yo mama so ugly they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower


You're a habit I'd like to kick; with both feet!!


I like your approach, now let's see your departure.


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More Funny Insults:


Yo momma's so stupid when she saw the "NC-17" sign, she went home and got 16 friends.


Yo momma's so fat her picture takes two frames.


The only things you ever make are mistakes and cigarette ashes.


Look At You And Then Look At Me Get The Idea You Are Far Of From Lookin Like Me


His personality's split so many ways he goes alone for group therapy.


I hear you are being accepted into an exclusive club because they need someone to snub.


When you were born, God admitted that even He could make a mistake!


He is living proof that man can live without a brain!


"See, that's what's meant by dark and handsome. When it's dark, he's handsome."- Anon


Yo mama so fat she got to iron her pants on the driveway!





One-Liner Top 5:

Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.
I feel like I would enjoy getting out of bed more if I had to do it only three times a week. This every-day thing is overkill.
Can I have your picture so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?
Love is like a machine... sometimes you need a good screw to fix it.
The more people I meet, the more I like my dog.