Funny Texts | 10 Funny Insults

"What makes him think a middle aged actor, who's played with a chimp, could have a future in politics?" - Ronald Reagan commenting on Eastwood's bid to become mayor of Carmel
He is so conceited his eyes behold each other perfectly.
Yo mama so fat she has to use a VCR as a beeper!
Yo mama so old her social security number is 1!
You're so fat you laid down in the ocean and Spain claimed you as the New World.
I don't mind that you are talking so long as you don't mind that I'm not listening.
Yo momma's so ugly, when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals."
Ordinarily people live and learn. You just live.
yo mama so fat when yo dad proposed to her he used onion rings
You are about as useful as a windshield wiper on a goat's ass.
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More Funny Insults:


I don't consider you a vulture. I consider you something a vulture would eat.

Yo momma's so stupid she got fired from a blow-job.

"If you can't live without me, why aren't you dead already?"- Cynthia Heimel

The next time you shave, could you stand a little closer to the razor?

Is your name Laryngitis? You're a pain in the neck.

You're so fat you laid down in the ocean and Spain claimed you as the New World.

If she was cast as Lady Godiva the horse would steal the show.

Yo mama so stupid when your dad said it was chilly outside, she ran outside with a spoon

Your family tree must be a cauctas cuz everyone on it is a prick

Yo mama so fat she has to buy two airline tickets.