Funny Texts | 10 Funny Insults

FUCK!
He has a mind like a steel trap - always closed!
Any friend of yours -- is a friend of yours.
I wish you were all here. I don't like to think there is more!
"A plumber's idea of cleopatra." - W. C. Fields talking about Mae West
Yo mama so poor when I saw her kicking a can down the street, I asked her what she was doing, she said "Moving."
Did your parents ever ask you to run away from home?
I heard you got a brain transplant and the brain rejected you!
A demitasse would fit his head like a sombrero.
"Don't you need a license to be that ugly?" - Anon
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More Funny Insults:


You're so ugly when you went to a haunted house they offered you a job.

"Her voice sounded like an eagle being goosed." - Ralph Novak on Yoko Ono

I hear you are connected to the Police Department -- by a pair of handcuffs.

You always have your ear to the ground. So how's life in the gutter?

Would you like some cheese and crackers to go with that whine?

I wouldn't piss in his ear if his brain was on fire!

Yo mama so fat the highway patrol made her wear "Caution! Wide Turn"

Yo momma's so stupid she bought a video camera to record cable TV shows at home.

Oh my god what is that ugly thing!!! Oh it's just you

"Like a death at a birthday party, you ruin all the fun... Like a sucked and spat out smartie, you're no use to anyone."- John Cooper Clarke