Funny Texts | 10 Funny Insults

I can't talk to you right now; tell me, where will you be in ten years?

"Can't act. Slightly bald. Can dance a little." - Anonymous screen test about Fred Astaire

They said you were a great asset. I told them they were off by two letters.

You grow on people - like a wart!

Everyone is gifted. Some open the package sooner.

yo mama so fat when she turns around its her birthday!!! :)

"He moves like a parody between a majorette girl and Fred Astaire." - Truman Capote on Mick Jagger

I would like the pleasure of your company, but it only gives me displeasure.

Yo momma's so fat at a restaurant when they give her the menu she replies " yes Please"

You should toss out more of your funny remarks; that's all they're good for.

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More Funny Insults:


Let's play house. You be the door and I'll slam you.


Don't thank me for insulting you. It was my pleasure.


Your dog is so stupid, he chases parked cars.


Yo momma's so ugly she turned Medusa to stone!


When you feel terrific, notify your face.


yo mama so stupid when your dad said it was chilly outside she ran out with a spoon. dominic zhang


Your moms so fat, she stood on the scales and it sed 'to be continued' !!!


Yo mama so fat she's got her own area code!


Don't think, it may sprain your brain!


Catty catty cat, yo pussy smells like pussy pussy cat





One-Liner Top 5:

Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.
Did you hear about the dyslexic Satanist? He sold his soul to Santa.
Try an internship! Internships give you all the experience of a summer job without the hassle of a paycheck.
Apple should make a sarcasm font and call it the iRoll.
Hey baby, wanna violate the Pauli Exclusion Principle with me?