Funny Insults * 10 Funny Insults

Yo mama so ugly they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints.

You could throw her in the river and skim ugly for two days.

You're the best at all you do - and all you do is make people hate you.

Yo momma's so fat her belly jiggle is the first ever perpetual motion machine.

Yo mama so ugly that when she sits in the sand on the beach, cats try to bury her.

Yo mama so tall she tripped in Michigan and hit her head in Florida.

His brain waves fall a little short of the beach.

Yo mama so ugly that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye.

They say that two heads are better than one. In your case, one would have been better than none.

I always wanted to be a trouble-shooter, but now I see you are not worth it!

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More Funny Insults:


"I knew right away that Rock Hudson was gay when he did not fall in love with me." - Gina Lollogrigida on Rock Hudson


He is living proof that man can live without a brain!


"He may look like an idiot and talk like an idiot but don't let that fool you. He really is an idiot."- Groucho Marx


a blonde walks into a hardware store and says" could i buy that microwave" and the shop keeper says " sorry don't serve blodes" so the next day she dies her hair green and comes back and says "could i buy that microwave please" and the shop keeper says " sorry don't serve blodes" so she walk out and comes back the next day with a fake tan and pink hair and says "can i buy that microwave please" and the shop keeper says " sorry I DON'T SERVE BLONDES" and then she says "I'M NOT BLONDE YOU IDIOT I HAVE PINK HAIR DAH!" then the shop keeper says "yes you are because that isn't a microwave it's a television." "oh well can i have that cd player" "It's a television and i don't serve blondes." so she walks out and then says " well see ya, be back for my meat shopping." "this girl is a ditsy blonde." Butterflygrl


You must have gotten up on the wrong side of the cage this morning.


Yo mama has a glass eye with a fish in it.


yo mama so fat she has her own zip code


In the land of the witless, the half-wit is king.


Whatever is eating you -- must be suffering horribly.


"A fellow with the inventiveness of Albert Einstein but with the attention span of Daffy Duck."- Tom Shales talking about Robin Williams



One-Liner Top 5:

The good Lord didn't create anything without a purpose, but mosquitoes come close.

The value of money in a relationship: the 10 bucks that the wife and the tax inspection don't know about are worth more than the 100 that both know about.

Children in the dark make accidents, but accidents in the dark make children.

What do you call Santa's helpers? Subordinate Clauses.

Lite: the new way to spell "Light," now with 20% fewer letters!




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