Funny Texts | 10 Funny Texts Riddles

What was the blonde doing up on the roof?

Answer!

Someone told her that the drinks were on the house!!
Did you hear about the new sushi bar that caters exclusively to lawyers?

Answer!

A. It is called Sosumi.
How does an attorney sleep?

Answer!

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
What did the lawyer name his daughter?

Answer!

Sue.
What are lawyers good for?

Answer!

They make used car salesmen look good.
What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50?

Answer!

Your Honor.
What do you get when you cross a bad politician with a crooked lawyer?

Answer!

Chelsea.
What happens when you cross a pig with a lawyer?

Answer!

Nothing. There are some things a pig will not do.
What is the difference between a lawyer and a liar?

Answer!

The pronunciation.
What is the difference between a lawyer and an onion?

Answer!

You cry when you cut up an onion.
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More Funny Texts Riddles:


How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?


Answer!

None. They just have marketing portray the dead bulb as a feature.

Where do fish keep their money?


Answer!

In a river-bank!

How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?


Answer!

Three. One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.

Why do blondes not have elevator jobs?


Answer!

They do not know the route.

What do you get if you cross a tarantula and a rose?


Answer!

I'm not sure, but I wouldn't try smelling it!

How many Bratzlaver Chassidim does it take to change a light bulb?


Answer!

None. They will never find one that burned as brightly as the first one.

What do you give a sick horse?


Answer!

Cough stirrup!

What is gray and blue and very big?


Answer!

An elephant holding it's breath!

What do you get if you cross a frog and a dog?


Answer!

A croaker spaniel!

What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?


Answer!

A Moo-sician!



One-Liner Top 5:

Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.
Can I have your picture so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?
No, those pants don't make you look fatter. I mean, how could they?
Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is.
Lite: the new way to spell "Light," now with 20% fewer letters!