Funny Texts | 10 Funny Texts Riddles

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Lawyers are like nuclear warheads.


Answer!

You gotta have them because the other guy has them.

What is black and brown and looks good on a lawyer?


Answer!

Doberman Pinscher.

How many poets does it take to change a light bulb?


Answer!

Three. One to curse the darkness, one to light a candle...and one to change the bulb.

What did the horse say when he fell?


Answer!

I have fallen and I can not giddy up!

Why should you never iron a 4-leaf clover?


Answer!

You do not want to press your luck!

What did the instructor at the school for Kamikaze pilots say to his students?


Answer!

Watch closely. I am only going to do this once

What do you call a lawyer gone bad?


Answer!

Senator.

What is the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?


Answer!

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.

What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50?


Answer!

Your Honor.

How does a blonde kill a fish?


Answer!

She drowns it
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More Funny Texts Riddles:


Where do hamsters come from?


Answer!

Hamsterdam!

Why do cows wear bells?


Answer!

Their horns don't work!

How do you know when you are old?


Answer!

When you can date someone half your age without breaking the law.

Why do seagulls fly over the sea?


Answer!

Because if they flew over the bay they would be called bagels!

What do you call a bird in the winter?


Answer!

Brrr-d!

How do you keep a blonde busy all day?


Answer!

Put her in a round room and tell her to sit in the corner.

How did the toad die?


Answer!

It croaked!

What do you get if you cross a Beatle and an Australian dog?


Answer!

Dingo Starr!

Why did the leopard wear a striped shirt?


Answer!

So she wouldn't be spotted!

Is it raining cats and dogs?


Answer!

It's okay, as long as it doesn't rein-deer!




One-Liner Top 5:

Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.
I feel like I would enjoy getting out of bed more if I had to do it only three times a week. This every-day thing is overkill.
Can I have your picture so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?
Love is like a machine... sometimes you need a good screw to fix it.
The more people I meet, the more I like my dog.