Funny Texts | 10 Funny Texts Riddles

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Lawyers are like nuclear warheads.


Answer!

You gotta have them because the other guy has them.

What is black and brown and looks good on a lawyer?


Answer!

Doberman Pinscher.

How many poets does it take to change a light bulb?


Answer!

Three. One to curse the darkness, one to light a candle...and one to change the bulb.

What did the horse say when he fell?


Answer!

I have fallen and I can not giddy up!

Why should you never iron a 4-leaf clover?


Answer!

You do not want to press your luck!

What did the instructor at the school for Kamikaze pilots say to his students?


Answer!

Watch closely. I am only going to do this once

What do you call a lawyer gone bad?


Answer!

Senator.

What is the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?


Answer!

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.

What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50?


Answer!

Your Honor.

How does a blonde kill a fish?


Answer!

She drowns it
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More Funny Texts Riddles:


Two flies are on the porch. Which one is an actor?


Answer!

The one on the screen!

What dog loves to take bubble baths?


Answer!

A shampoodle!

How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?


Answer!

None. They just have marketing portray the dead bulb as a feature.

What type of horse can jump higher than a house?


Answer!

All of them. Houses can't jump!

Daughter: Mum, can I have a canary for Christmas?


Answer!

Mum: NO! You'll have turkey like everyone else

What snakes are found on cars?


Answer!

Windshield vipers!

Why did the blonde bake a chicken for 3-1/2 days?


Answer!

It said cook it for half an hour per pound, and she weighed 125 lbs.

What do you give the blonde who has everything?


Answer!

Penicillin!

What happens when it rains cats and dogs?


Answer!

You might step in a poodle!

A blond going to London on a plane, how can you steal her window seat?


Answer!

Tell her the seats that are going to London are all in the middle row.




One-Liner Top 5:

Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.
I feel like I would enjoy getting out of bed more if I had to do it only three times a week. This every-day thing is overkill.
Can I have your picture so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?
Love is like a machine... sometimes you need a good screw to fix it.
The more people I meet, the more I like my dog.