Funny Texts | 10 Funny Texts Riddles

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Lawyers are like nuclear warheads.


Answer!

You gotta have them because the other guy has them.

What is black and brown and looks good on a lawyer?


Answer!

Doberman Pinscher.

How many poets does it take to change a light bulb?


Answer!

Three. One to curse the darkness, one to light a candle...and one to change the bulb.

What did the horse say when he fell?


Answer!

I have fallen and I can not giddy up!

Why should you never iron a 4-leaf clover?


Answer!

You do not want to press your luck!

What did the instructor at the school for Kamikaze pilots say to his students?


Answer!

Watch closely. I am only going to do this once

What do you call a lawyer gone bad?


Answer!

Senator.

What is the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?


Answer!

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.

What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50?


Answer!

Your Honor.

How does a blonde kill a fish?


Answer!

She drowns it
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More Funny Texts Riddles:


Where does a penguin keep its money?


Answer!

In a snow bank!

What is the difference between a lawyer and a liar?


Answer!

The pronunciation.

Which animal grows down?


Answer!

A duck!

Did you hear about the blonde who got locked in the bathroom?


Answer!

She was in there so long, she wet her pants.

How many Bratzlaver Chassidim does it take to change a light bulb?


Answer!

None. They will never find one that burned as brightly as the first one.

What do you call a cow with two legs?


Answer!

Lean beef!

Which side of a chicken has the most feathers?


Answer!

The outside!

Why did the boy stand behind the horse?


Answer!

He thought he might get a kick out of it!

How does an attorney sleep?


Answer!

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.

Why did the shark spit out the clown?


Answer!

Because he tasted funny!




One-Liner Top 5:

Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.
I feel like I would enjoy getting out of bed more if I had to do it only three times a week. This every-day thing is overkill.
Can I have your picture so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?
Love is like a machine... sometimes you need a good screw to fix it.
The more people I meet, the more I like my dog.