Funny Texts


Trump: "Foreign Policy? If you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee!"

Funny Riddles

What is the difference between a lawyer and a liar?
The pronunciation!


Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.

Funny Messenger Texts

I have a picture of u, I think its very nice, I put it under my bed... 2 scare away the mice!

Inspirational Quotes

The only way to do great work is to love what you do. By Steve Jobs

Funny Insults

There was something about you that I liked, but you spent it!

Funny SMS Texts & Messages

What happened 2 ur network? I tried 2 call u but the operator said "Welcome 2 the jungle, the monkey u r trying to call is on the tree....Plz try later."

One-Liner Top 5:

The good Lord didn't create anything without a purpose, but mosquitoes come close.

The value of money in a relationship: the 10 bucks that the wife and the tax inspection don't know about are worth more than the 100 that both know about.

Children in the dark make accidents, but accidents in the dark make children.

Even if you were twice as smart, you'd still be stupid!

Lite: the new way to spell "Light," now with 20% fewer letters!