What do you call a prostitute with no arms or legs?
Cash and carry!
What is funnier than a zombie baby hanging from a ceiling fan?
Hitting it with a shovel when it comes around.
A chicken and an egg are lying in bed.
The chicken is smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face.
The egg is frowning and looking very frustrated.
The egg mutters, to no one in particular, 'Well, I guess we answered THAT question!'
Shannon is so lose she could be a wide reciver.
cause any guy with some balls can score on with lose shit
Why do Iraqis only have 2 pallbearers at their funerals?
Because garbage cans only have 2 handles!
What do Saddam and Miss Muffet have in common?
They both have Kurds in their Way!
What is funnier then a dead Osama bin Laden?
A dead Osama bin Laden in a clown suit!
What do you do if your dishwasher stops working.
Why did Smokey the Bear never have children?
Because every time his wife got hot, he hit her with a shovel.
The tooth fairy always told me that if i sold my body parts like my teeth then i would get some money..... so i blame the mother fuckin 'toothfairy'