Dirty Jokes
Home / Funny jokes / Dirty Jokes

Dirty Jokes

This page contains 10 Dirty Jokes. The jokes are in order of votes, the best Dirty Jokes first.

Thank You!

This guy goes to a 5 dollar hooker and takes her home for the night.
A couple days later,he finds out he has crabs, so he goes to the hooker and confronts her and says '
You gave me crabs.'
And the hooker says 'For 5 dollars what did you expect lobsters?'

What did the maxi pad say to the fart?
You are the wind beneath my wings.

A man had to go to the bathroom really bad and the Men's bathroom was locked so he had to go into the Women's.
When he got there, there was three buttons.
One said 'TP'
for Toilet Paper, the second said 'HW'
for Handwashing, and the last said 'TR'
and he didn't know what it ment.
After he was finished, he pressed 'TP'
for toilet paper and 'HW'
to wash his hands.
He got curious and press the third button.
Next thing he knows, he's in the hospital in severe pain.
The third button was a Tampon Removal.

What do you call a million Mexicans rolling down a hill.
A mudslide!

Why are black people so good at basketball?
Because they can shoot, steal and run!

What does a girl and a plane have in common?
They both have cockpits.

Two men are approaching each other on a sidewalk.
Both are dragging their right foot as they walk.
As they meet, one man looks at the other knowingly, points to his foot and says, 'Vietnam, 1969.'
The other points his thumb behind him and says, 'Dog crap, 20 feet back.'

It is 10:00 at the police station and there is only 2 officers working that day...Billy-Bob and Billi-Jo.
billy-bob: hey billi-jo...can i stick my finger in your belly-button?
billi-jo: sure billy-bob!:> ...now its 11:00 at the police station... billy-bob: hey billi-jo...can i stick my finger in your belly-button?
billi-jo: sure billy-bob!:> ...now its midnight... and the power goes out...!
billy-bob: hey billi-jo...can i stick my finger in your belly-button?
billi-jo: sure billy-bob!:> wait?!
billy-bob thats not my belly-button.
billy-bob: i know...:> and thats not my finger!:>

This Old man decided to go to a whore house one night.
When he arrived he went to the owner and he said, 'Listen, I want a girl with Gonorrhea!'
The owner nodded and sent him upstairs to a room.
Then she called one of her favorites for him.
The girl went into the room and started to undress for him.
He quickly asked, 'Do you have Gonorrhea?'
'Gonorrhea?
I certainly do not!'
she said.
The Old man sent her back and requested a girl with Gonorrhea.
The owner called over one girl and told her to say she had to just to make him happy.
So the girl went up to the room and the old man asked, 'Do you have Gonorrhea?'
She smiled and said, 'Of course I do.'
They got into bed and begun to fuck away.
It lasted 10 minutes then she said, 'Listen Old man, I have a confession to make, I don't have Gonorrhea.'
The Old man smiled and replied, 'Now you do!'

How do you make stew out of a leper?
Put him in a Jacuzzi and turn it on full.




1 2 3 (4) 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Categories:
Animal Bad Bar Dumb Blonde Celebrity Cheesy Chicken Christmas Chuck Norris Clean Computer Corny Dad Dark Humor Doctor Dirty Donald Trump Easter Fat For Kids Funny Riddles Funny Quotes Little Johnny Gay Gender Good Halloween Knock Knock Lawyer Lightbulb Jokes Military Old People One Liner Jokes Ponderisms Puns Redneck Relationship Religious School Short Jokes Silly Skeleton Valentines Day Yo Mama


Funny jokes