Doctor Jokes

This page contains 10 Doctor Jokes. The jokes are in order of votes, the best Doctor Jokes first.

A lady walks into her doctors office screaming.
She yells, 'Doctor, Doctor my breasts are hairy!
What do I do?'
The doctor asks, 'Well, how long does the hair grow?'
The lady replies, 'From here to my penis, but that's a different story!'

A distraught patient phoned her doctor's office.
'Is it true', the woman wanted to know, 'that the medication you prescribed has to be taken for the rest of my life?'
'Yes, I'm afraid so.'
The doctor told her.
There was a moment of silence before the woman continued, 'I'm wondering, then, just how serious my condition is.
This prescription is marked 'NO REFILLS.''

Patient: How do you know that eating carrots is good for my eyes?
Eye Doctor: Have you ever seen a rabbit wearing glasses?!

A man having trouble achieving an erection decides to consult a witch doctor.
The witch doctor throws some herbs on a fire, shakes his rattle, and says, 'I have placed a powerful spell on you, but it will only work once a year.
Just say 'one, two, three' and you'll get the largest erection you've ever had.
After your wife's been satisfied, simply say 'one, two, three, four' and it will disappear for 12 months.'
Later that night as the man is lying in bed watching television, he says to his wife, 'Watch this!
One, two, three!'
His schlong becomes larger and stiffer than ever before.
His wife is amazed.
She smiles and says, 'That's great!
But what did you say 'one, two, three' for?'

Patient: 'Doctor, I think I swallowed a pillow.'
Doctor: 'How do you feel?'
Patient: 'A little down in the mouth!'

Doctor: Did you know that there are more than 1,000 bones in the human body?
Larry: Shhh, doctor!
There are three dogs outside in the waiting room!

Mary: My daughter believes in preventative medicine, doctor.
Doctor: Oh, really?
Mary: Yes, she tries to prevent me from making her take it!

Patient: 'Doctor, I think I need glasses.'
Teller: 'You certainly do!
This is a bank.'

GRACE HAD TO GO TO THE DOCTER TODAY .
HEY DOCTER YOUR SO DUME IM DONE WITH YOU IM GOING TO A NOTHER DOCTER YO.

What do puppies and gynecologists have in common?
Wet noses!

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