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Knock Knock Jokes

This page contains 10 Knock Knock Jokes. The jokes are in order of votes, the best Knock Knock Jokes first.

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Knock, Knock Who's there?
Highway.
Highway who?
Highway 95 pounds!

Will you remember me tomorrow?
yes will your remember me in a week?
yes a month?
yes a year?
yes 10 years?
yes Knock Knock who's there?
I thought you said you'd remember me!

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Venice
Venice who?
Venice your mother coming home?

Knock, knock.
Who�s there?
Stopwatch.
Stopwatch who?
Stopwatcha doin� and open the stupid door.

Knock, knock.
Who�s there?
Ya.
Ya who?
Wow. You sure are excited to see me!

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Wire
Wire who?
Wire you asking me?

Knock, knock Who's there?
Sorry, wrong door.
Okay.
Knock, knock Who's there?
Federal Express Federal Express who?
I don't know.
I just deliver packages.
Knock, knock Who's there?
Tom.
Tom who?
Tom Buchanan.
Hi Tom.
Knock knock Who's there?
Pizza delivery guy.
Pizza delivery guy who?
You ordered a pizza?
Yes.
I'm the guy delivering it.
Great.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Susan.
Susan who?
Susan Caldwell.
I'll be right out, Susan.
Knock, knock Who's there.
You might be a redneck if... you think tobacco is a vegetable.
You might be a redneck if... you think tobacco is a vegetable who?
I thought this was a redneck joke.
Nope.
It's a knock, knock joke.
Oops.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Boo Boo who Don't get so upset, crybaby!
What?
Ha!
Ha!
I made you say "boo-hoo"
You're a real idiot.
That wasn't necessary.
Knock knock Who's there?
Creeping penis.
Creeping penis who?
I'm not crazy, I just need to get off this island.
The doctors don't believe I invented the chocolate éclair.
But I did.
I'm going to burn them all and drink soup from their skulls!
Happy soup!
Untie me and I'll kill you last!
Knock, knock Yo mama Yo mama who?
Yo mama so fat, she caught a flesh-eating virus and that was three years ago.
I bet you're fat, huh?
I'm... You are, aren't you?
Fat!
I'm plumpish.
Knock, knock Who's there?
FBI!
... ... Hello?
FBI!
Let us in!
... ...nobody here... Oh.
Let's go boys!
(Phew!) Knock, knock Who's there?
There's a dead old woman in your driveway.
There's a dead old woman in your driveway who?
No.
Seriously.
There's a dead old woman in your driveway.
Actually, that's just my piss-drunk bar slut of a grandmother.
She sells toothless mouth love for "mind eraser"
shooters at the Tyson's Mall TGIFriday's.
Let the whore sleep it off.
Knock, knock Who's there?
Henry.
Henry who?
Henry Kissinger.
Did you know that power is the ultimate aphrodisiac?
I'm not opening the door Henry.
Damn.
Knock, knock Tremble mortal and despair - it is I, THE ANGEL OF DEATH!
Tremble mortal and despair - it is I, THE ANGEL OF DEATH who?
Actually, I'm here for Jones in #D1 but I need to take a monster crap and I hate to kill and THEN use the bathroom, you know?
Its rude and the other way around, well it ruins my dramatic entrance.
So... You want to use my toilet?
Yeah?
Go right ahead.
Got anything to read?
Just the crossword.
You finished it.
Sorry?
Hold my scythe.
Hey!
Don't forget to light a match.

Will you remember in a year?
Yes.
Will you remember in a month?
Yes.
Will you remember in a week?
Yes.
Will you remember in a day?
Yes.
Knock, knock
Who's there?
You forgot me already!